Hello, darlings! Now listen, lovers of mischief and free speech. I’ve been inundated with questions, and I’m taking a break from watching my skyrocketing sales on Amazon to answer the most important queries you’ve sent in.

Yes! Firstly, and most importantly, MILO is the fairest of them all.

For my US based fans, Barnes & Noble now has DANGEROUS on sale!  Please purchase it on paper or for your Nook. Or both! And a couple for your fat sisters and one to slide under your feminist professor’s desk.

We will have other pre-order options available soon. For instance, signed copies! Stay tuned on that front.

Of course we will have an audiobook, and of course I will be recording it myself. The only other person who could possibly do this work of art justice is Mariah Carey, and I’m sorry to say even I can’t afford that.

I’ve received some concerns about whether local independent bookstores will carry DANGEROUS. The truth is: who knows? If bookstores operated purely for profit, they’d rip out the feminism and atheism sections and fill the shelves with compilations of my best Breitbart columns. But so long as brick and mortar stores are still loopy enough to stock Ben Shapiro and Bill Kristol, the best advice I can give you is: stick with Amazon.

For my fans outside the United States, Amazon will carry DANGEROUS in every market it serve. But this is a process controlled by Amazon itself, so it may take some time for hardback editions to become available in every market. Sit tight. We’re doing our best!

If none of these worries apply to you, then you’ve simply been too lazy to pre-order the book. Shame on you!

Now earn back my affection by pre-ordering from either Amazon or Barnes & Noble without further delay:

AMAZON

B&N 

  • dutz

    Done

    • el_uro

      + mine

  • HunchbackKing

    Hahaha. Love you Milo. You’re my favorite Queen!

  • hegedujd

    Holding off for a signed copy!

  • positively4thstreet

    I ordered the hardcover from Canada…so also paying shipping, duty, our tax, and dollar differential. Only to find out now…you will be selling signed copies???? Just lucky you’re so cute and the best shit disturber I know of or I might be pissed off I missed out on the signed copy.

    • Jennifer-Bradley Klappich

      Give you first copy to a friend who needs it and buy a signed copy for yourself! Usually at home we share books but everybody is buying a copy! I want to walk in to Barnes and Noble and buy a paper copy. I would love love love for someone to talk shit when I do it!

  • Kim Kramarski-Smith

    Milo, cant you tour venues other than colleges ? So worth the ticket price

    • Eeeeeee

      This a millions times! Why can’t you go on a tour for larger venues, opened to everyone?

      • Duhitar

        Because Milo’s a s**t stirrer and likes to confront his enemies.

    • Robert Lund

      Milo’s like a General Patton going to the front lines where his troops are in most dire need 🙂

      • swampdrainer65

        And college campuses are where the snowflakes are, needing to be slayed!

      • Ray Johnston

        I’d prefer him to be more like Douglas “mad af” MacArthur and send supplies (containers of Dangerous from Port of Los Angeles) to us in the asia-pacific “theater”. (sic) I’m not paying $14.95 Amazon shipping costs to Australia so i’ll wait till it’s available on bookdepository.

    • Shadowfax

      In his Cinco de Milo speech, he said he would go anywhere. But someone needs to invite him. So get up and start organizing 🙂

    • Pat Patrix

      They’re the ones who need to listen to him the most.

    • Vadim Bobkovsky

      Milo thrives on angry cucks/feminists/muslims as I’m sure you’ve seen from YouTube clips of his previous tours. Their tears are delicious.

    • Jennifer-Bradley Klappich

      I agree! I would pay a lot to see Milo speak in my city. I live in Atlanta and I think tons of people would protest but I would happily pay and show my face at an awesome Milo speech.

  • Victoria Phibes

    Pre-ordered yesterday from Amazon, Milo!

  • Lotsa Snuggs

    milo, my flower….i have a lil tiny budget, but your fabulous book is slated for the july edition. so proud of you, hon! xoxo, from alabama

  • Clementine

    I pre-ordered it as soon as it was available. Milo, I hope you know how much we love and support you.

  • Pat Patrix

    For Mariah Carey to narrate your novel she’d have to know how to read first.

    • Denise DeChant

      Milo could narrate it best anyway.

    • Ivan_in_Phoenix

      Mariah sounds like she’s whining when she talks. Milo would be humorous doing it.

  • RJ

    Hey Milo! Amazon never refunded me for your last release…. Does this mean I tell them to get snappy & hurry it over now? Or better yet… Can you call them and have them simply send the new one??

    You should come over & read it to me. In our underwear. I can tie you to my leather couch and wipe it down with Eros.Every once in a while. We can take breaks for bumps &/or I can slap your face with my hard on? It’s not one of those nasty subsaharan savage donkey cocks…. But it get extremely red & hard enough to break things (i.e. Remote control of the table- smash, big mug of extremely black coffee onto white carpet, all true stories.); but no seriously, I shoot such hard loads that you can get your Adam’s apple knocked in if you’re not careful – c’mon… I think you need to stop playing with the jungle animals & come get your master race groove on…? With a descendent of Aeneas ????

    I’d love to bend u over on the windowsill so you can yodel & scream Daddy just as the Pride parade ends on my block, here on CHRISTOPHER St. I’d love to see the crowds reaction, as we sit together, cum drenched, and take turns reading excerpts from “Dangerous”. I have BOTTLES of pink pills… Let me be Ernst Röhm (after a diet and gym membership) and you can play Adolf… Cum, sieg my Heil ✋????????????????????????????

  • Adrian Valle

    Milo!

  • Karen Curtis

    I am looking forward to reading it, however I am an atheist.

  • Dave in Georgia

    Boxers, briefs, or banana-hammock?

  • True.Epic.Crusader

    SIGNED copies??? But I’ve already pre-ordered!!! Any way to upgrade?
    Ah, forget it, I’ll just buy it again and give the non-signed one to somebody else.

  • Danny Campbell

    I’ll pre-order the Audiobook as soon as it’s listed via Audible on Amazon. Please Hurry !!

  • SBGrin

    Get your super gay fabulous ass to Australia for a tour! XD

  • Kim Kramarski-Smith

    We have got to keep fighting . As we have seen in recent events, the Left is getting out of control. VIOLENCE WILL NOT BE TOLERATED. Sad but it is coming to a CIVIL WAR.

  • ssgtnelson

    “Yes! Firstly, and most importantly, MILO is the fairest of them all.”
    Well… that answered my only question.

  • Dudley Morris

    My preorder is in, and I’m just hoping that it’s better than the leaked early draft BuzzFeed has apparently is…

  • Monsieur de Comte Beaujangles

    +10

  • KKaren Barnette

    Love it.